I bet that title got your attention didn’t it! This post is inspired by one Becky did in which she listed a fun fact about herself was her love of horror movies going back to when she was a kid. Me too! This post, and the title, will be an eye opener for every mom out there, including my own mom, who I don’t think even knows some of this! Oh and yes, for those who don’t know, my mom reads this blog.

What was the first horror flick I ever saw? I can’t recall. I remember when I was in 2nd grade though “The Creature From The Black Lagoon” came on on Baltimore 45 in 3D! WOW! I remember watching it. However I also remember my parents watching “It’s Alive!” (I believe), cause I remember nightmares of some devil kid in my closet. Now to be fair, I also had nightmares about the Wicked Witch from “The Wizard of Oz” and Medusa from “Clash of the Titans,” who I was convinced lived under my bed. My mom even says she had to take me out of the theater for that scene. I had some issues as a kid, though somehow I became a horror movie junkie.

BTW apparently to the people “up north” in Jersey/Philly I pronounce the term “horror movie” as “whore movie,” which makes a lot of people turn their heads. “You’re going to what kind of movie convention?” Just another fun fact!

Okay back to 2nd grade. Well around that time on Baltimore 45 they showed “Psycho” which I also saw. Terrified of Mrs. Bates! Also there was “Trilogy of Terror,” which I own. I still don’t remember the boring first two stories from that movie, nobody does do they? No, we all remember the Zuni fetish doll that terrorized Karen Black around her apartment. Ironically when I saw it as an adult I was more fascinated by the fact that her anthropologist boyfriend gave it to her. Nice guy! The doll was in fact silly compared to what they release today, but still good for nostalgia.

This was the same time my lovely babysitters Beth and Debbie also showed me two horror flicks that I’ve never forgotten. The first was “Let’s Scare Jessica To Death,” which to this day still holds up. Comcast just showed it a few months back on FearNet and I watched it. It’s still bizarre as hell, but I don’t want to say too much about otherwise it gives it away. Let’s just say it involves a woman fresh out of a mental institute questioning whether she’s really nuts or not.

The other was “Basket Case.” Oh yes, that lovable movie about the guy who had his Siamese twin cut off from the side of him, only to carry him around in a basket and have him murder everyone around him. Yes they showed me and my brother this film to laugh at the full frontal nudity of the male star running down the street in one scene. “Look a penis!”

These are my earliest horror movie memories . . .

With it being Halloween, I find myself reflecting on my love of horror movies. Especially given the ages of the BF’s niece and nephews. They are giant scaredy cats, they can’t get through Harry Potter without having nightmares. Oh how I wish I could corrupt them! I think it’s funny given how afraid and basically sheltered they are in ways . . .

The niece is in 2nd grade. Clearly I had seen all of the above by time I was her age.

The middle one is in 4th grade. This would be when we got our first VCR (a BetaMax!) and my mother gave me free reign at Erols (our local version of Blockbuster) to rent out the entire horror section. Oh yes, I saw it all, from “Evil Dead” (the grossest thing available then) to “Microwave Massacre” (the dumbest thing available then).

Then there is the oldest who is in 7th grade. By that age there was nothing left I hadn’t seen! I had seen all the “Friday’s” to that point, “Nightmare,” as many “Halloweens” they had made (my brother and I still will sing the “Silver Shamrock” song to this day). I’m pretty sure that was when the “Hellraisers” were breaking out and I saw those too. I had seen all the “Living Deads” and “Chucky.” If they made it, I saw it.

Hmmmmmm, maybe this is why I’m so screwed up and did what I did to my house Or maybe I just want to annoy the fundy church down the road to no end? No, I did it cause I love decorating for Halloween and used to do this on a very minor scale to our old townhouse when I was a kid (we had the best house on the block for a few years). Okay I admit it, I do think it would be funny if the church down the road tried to file a complaint with the township too (it’s a secret goal I’m working towards).

Signed yours in all things “whore”
-Dustin

P.S. I couldn’t let this post go given the title without saying “Have you checked the children?”

P.S.S. I never tire of this! It’s time for Silver Shamrock kids, so put on your masks!