So I just got back from seeing “The Happening,” which honestly I went to out of boredom mostly. After seeing it, I’m pretty sure this is what was going through M. Night’s head when he came up with the idea for the movie . . . .

Okay first this thing is going to happen, and it will make everyone on screen and in the audience be like “What’s happening?” Then everyone will be like “OMG I can’t believe this is happening.” About thirty minutes in I’m going to have the character played by Otis from ‘Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman’ say “I think this is what is happening!” Then about thirty minutes later Marky Mark’s character will be like “I think that crazy guy was right about what is happening!” Then when you get to the end of the film the shock will be no characteristic M. Night movie twist and the audience will be like “So you mean that really is what happened?” Then after the credits roll everyone will leave the theater thinking about the movie and saying “You know there have always been those stories that one day something like that could happen.”

Of course if you see the movie with the people I saw it with then you’ll probably hear people saying things like “That movie sucked,” “That was the worst movie ever” and “I’m tired of going to see shitty movies.”