Since I know some might be wondering how things went today, as of yet nothing has happened. This of course doesn’t mean it won’t. From what I found out, John’s sister had a talk with the oldest and basically said “This is not to be discussed with your father, he doesn’t need to know you all know.” Even the oldest understood this reasoning, there are some things we just don’t tell him because it will cause issues and drama. If this can be avoided with the man, it usually is.

Now how long the kids will keep their mouths shut is not known. More than likely one of the other kids will mention something in passing, so IF he hears the comment (he’s really hard of hearing) then it will become an issue. More so when he figures out they’ve all had the talk and of course he was not involved and get to add his opinion. It’s his opinion that he didn’t get to drill into the kids that will be the biggest issue with him on this subject. Trust me, he will have words to say on this subject, and not kind ones.

Now I know many will say “These are his kids, he has a right to be involved and teach them the morals he sees fit.” Yes, but at the same time, you don’t know this man. He has grown children from the first marriage that are about John’s age, or a little younger. When John came out years ago, let’s just say he quickly turned all his kids against John. They apparently went from being very friendly with John to not even speaking to him. Earlier this year one of these kids got married and John was invited to the wedding, which was clearly just done to be polite. John was invited, just John, not John plus a guest. Yes they know about me too, and I’m sure all bad things they’ve gotten from their dad.

So when I said in my last post that he most likely would ban the kids from seeing me, ban them from our house, probably try and ban then from even hanging out with John; no I wasn’t kidding.

Oh we found out that the father, not long ago, gave the oldest son a book on politics to read. Knowing the father, it was probably one of those “How Liberals Are Destroying America” books. I asked John to find out the book, as I’m sure there is a whole chapter on the evil homosexual agenda.

As for the kids and how they are reacting. Well I saw the oldest briefly, all he basically said was “Hi.” He is at that stage where he’s pretty anti-social, he knows more than the adults around him, when adults speak they say stupid things. So I can’t say for sure if I was snubbed or not. He said hello to John too this morning, that was about it. The youngest of course is not phased at all. She was hanging all over me as usual, wanting us to go swimming in the pool. The middle child I haven’t seen all day.

In other news, I think I’m giving up on the vegetarianism, at least for a bit. Not because of a weak will, but because of the scale. I was at 158 last month, now after the boot camp and two weeks of eating crap, I’m up to 165. I’m not happy, I haven’t been this heavy since last May. In January I was at 155, last December I think I had gotten down to 148 (145 is my goal weight). I think it will be easier for me to drop pounds eating chicken and the various stockpile of lean cuisine’s in the basement. I’m just eating too much pasta and carbs with the vegie stuff. What I will NOT go back to is red meat though. That and McDonalds, Wendys, Burger King, etc . . . .

I also know once I get back into running the weight should come off pretty quickly too. I think I’m going to try and keep getting up on the earlier side as I had been and run in the morning to wake me up. Once alert, then I’ll be ready to put in my 4 hours minimum of writing that day.

It’s late, I’m pooped, and after I was told this story I literally downed a glass of vodka in anticipation/dread of tomorrow. Sorry for any mistakes

So John came home tonight to tell me how he rocked his niece and nephews world (mostly just the oldest nephew). Oh yes, this is a story which will probably turn into huge drama tomorrow. I might just have to stay away from the farm for the day, but probably won’t be able to resist pre-4th fireworks.

First some background. John has two nephews and a niece that live here (three grown nieces in Texas). The oldest nephew is going into 8th grade, the middle child/nephew is going into 6th grade and the niece into 3rd grade. I’m fairly certain those are their grades

Well John’s entire family is also VERY Republican (well except apparently the nieces in Texas). During the election I got an earful from the 3rd grader as to why Obama was a bad man and I shouldn’t vote for him. She recited what she heard at home pretty well! Did she understand what she was saying? Probably not Well apparently lately the 8th grader has really been on a “Obama and the democrats have ruined this country beyond repair” kick. This is basically how this all started.

At the dinner table it was John, his mother and the childrenz. The news was apparently on, and the 8th grader was just apparently giving his usual “It’s the Democrats fault” shtick. They were probably doing the weather report on how it will rain on the 4th. You think that’s a joke, but seriously, it would be the Democrats fault. (We have such power, who knew!)

John apparently informed the 8th grader that we just came out of 8 years of a republican white house as well as years of a republican controlled senate, so did he really think within 6 months anything was going to get done or solved given the dilemma our country was in? And how did he think we got here? Was it all the democrats fault?

Well the middle child asked John if he was a democrat. John said yes he was. The middle child asked why? The 8th grader decided to answer by saying “Because he doesn’t know any better.” Oh yes, he did! I’m sorry, but I hate that answer, and republicans give it in spades. I can accept that many people who are republicans came to that choice through their own decision (okay and for many yes their church) so why do they always have to assume people who are democrats are so because they are dumb? Sorry, but that statement makes republicans look dumb in my opinion

Okay I got sidetracked by a tangent. John apparently also got steamed at that point and said he was a democrat because he was a gay American. This is how he told the story to me, I don’t know what else was said. Frankly I would have phrased it as one of the reasons, not the only reason. To be a democrat just because you are gay is as naive as the republican insult I ranted on before. To go on another tangent, I grew up with my parents never talking about politics and I assumed they were republicans cause most of our family was. Hey we lived in Virginia! I remember thinking Reagan and George the 1st were great. It was the first Iraq war that turned me to the dark side though I identified as democrat along time before I admitted to myself and others I was gay. I only found out my parents were democrats when I was adult and myself got interested in politics and bothered to ask them questions. And yes, I know Obama and the democrats have not gone out of their way to help gays, but unlike George the 2nd I don’t expect democrats in this day and age to make it a priority to hinder gays with stupid marriage amendments either (and yes I know we are were we are in part thanks to Clinton signing Doma – like I said I’m not a total idiot).

Okay back on track. Well the middle child responds to the gay news with “I’m guessing you aren’t talking about being happy?” These kids do know what gay is, we live in an open area, they help run a farm market stand on weekends in the gay mecca of South Jersey (Collingswood). John said no . . . and then this is where I got involved. He then told them “And Dustin isn’t my housemate” which is what they have believed for years and years and years. That we are best friends who live together. Honestly, I expected to be questioned yearsssss ago about this and never was. They even regularly come over to play videogames here and really never ask questions about photos and stuff hanging around! Yes I guess they really were that naive/sheltered.

John said he thinks the middle child and youngest probably could careless about this revelation, either they really care less or they are too young to be bothered by it (I disagree, more in a few). He thinks though that the oldest child was in fact shocked. As John put it, he now has to think for himself and evaluate some things rather than regurgitate what his father tells him. Oh, you don’t want to get me started on what KINDS of things he could hear about the gays from his father. We are talking about a man who once felt a close friend of the family was only gay because he had a crummy relationship with his father growing up.

John’s sister was none too pleased with him apparently, as now she has to sit down and have this talk with her kids. My opinion on this of course is that is is far too late and overdue. I mean this is an important talk to have with kids when they are young enough. It’s not different than the racism talk, as well as the sex talk. Okay the sex talk is probably #1, otherwise your kids will end up on that new MTV show “Pregnant at 16 (if they are lucky to make it to 16!).

Ahhh another tangent! Back on track. Basically kids in this day and age know what gays are, if they haven’t been exposed to us evil gays on nasty liberal TV then they got the education in school and probably from the mouths of kids who are repeating what their asshole parents said. We do however live in a very open and accepting area, not to mention an area with a high school known for the drama department and churning out stars (shout out to Ali Larter and Kelli Rippa), so here is hoping these kids got some positive information as well. I mean in this day and age, talk to your kids and talk early. It’s everywhere now, they’ll get exposed with or without your input (just like sex), so make it a positive experience. I learned what gay was when I was in 3rd grade, cause the kids in school called me faggot, gay-wad and teased me that I was going to have a sex-change operation when I grew up. Yes, 3rd grade. This was a long time ago too, so don’t think your kids will live in a bubble about this issue!

The father’s reaction is of course going to be the biggie. I think John and I are going on 8 years together now. You know how many conversations I’ve had with this man? None. I think he’s said all of 2 sentences, maybe 3, to me in all these years. I remember one was bitching at me for always being around too. A second was “Where is John at.” The man never bothered to get to know me, I was John’s lova and that made his mind up for him. Since then I have heard all the shit he has told the employees at the farm about me over the years. Let’s see . . . . John supports me. I live in John’s house and don’t pay the bills. I mooch of John and the family (IE his family). My favorite is that all I do is sit home all day and smoke dope. As recently as last month one employee was shocked that I didn’t smoke dope. He said “but you used to right?” I said “no, in spite of what X said, I have never smoked dope!” That in fact is the truth. I can honestly say I have only taken one drag off of one joint in my life, and that was enough for me. I have also NEVER smoked a cigarette, period. I have never done crack, coke or any other drug either. Obviously from the beginning of this post, I have had alcohol

So there you have it. Tomorrow could be big fun! Did you have big fun with “The Wretched” Vanessa? Did you? Like I said, the father has hated me for years. He hates that the kids like to come over to our house and play. He hates that the kids even talk to me and hang out with me. I have a feeling someone is going to try and make new rules banning me and this house lol. Bring it, someone has had an ass kicking coming for 7 years. I can honestly say I long for an excuse to punch the man. Yes, I know, violence never solves anything. But didn’t we all cheer when Daniel-san kicked some ass at the end of the movie

So Boot Camp is almost at an end. On some level I’m sad, on some I’m not. After today I see I have gotten a lot done this week. By Friday, heck possibly by Thursday, I’ll have 100 some pages to send off to my adviser to read, part of the much over do data analysis chapters. I just have to make sure I continue to get these 4 hours minimum of work in a day. I now have at least some structure to these final chapters that have been a headache for far too long.

Of course what I won’t miss are driving into Philly each day, and especially the parking fees! I will miss the yummy food I’ve been eating, but my waste line won’t. I am NOT a morning person. I do not drink coffee, I do not drink tea. So I’ve been reaching for Coke to wake me up these past 2 weeks. Coke = a giant sugar bomb! I can’t believe how much of this stuff I used to drink and not put on weight. Yes I could drink diet coke, but frankly it tastes like stale ass. I can’t do it. I mean come on, I don’t like water cause of how it tastes, do you think I’m drinking diet coke? I do like diet Dr. Pepper, but it makes me belch like Shrek, so I have avoided it too. The yummy delicious high in sugar and other bad for you stuff Chinese food I’ve been getting daily probably isn’t great for me either. I know it isn’t, cause by mid-afternoon there is a brick sitting in my stomach.

Basically the 2 weeks I had Pink Eye I lost 5 pounds, lets just say I’ve gained it back and then some. I’ll be happy to get back to more normal eating and back to the gym again. As for what is normal eating, I’m rethinking the vegetarianism yet again. I’ll probably give it till mid-July and make a decision. Lately I have been keeping track of various budgets (via Pocket Money on iPhone), and let’s just say the grocery bill sky rocketed this month. Morning Star Farms makes great veggie foods, but they aren’t cheap and they don’t go on sale that much. Meanwhile I have a stockpile of Lean Cuisines downstairs in a freezer that I haven’t eaten cause they are chicken dishes mostly. Yeah, we are talking 2 weeks of pre-bought food. Hmmmmmm. I told John to start eating them for lunch last month (he’s trying to lose some weight too) but he never did. Don’t get me started on his lunches!

Let’s see, what else to update on. My friend Heidi is coming to visit in July, woohoo! We met on a cruise a few years back. She’s coming for a weekend, so I have to figure out what we are doing. There is tons of stuff I’ve never done in the 11 some years living here (Gettysburg, Hershey Park (okay did that at 10 years old, but want to go back), Valley Forge, Atlantic City, Wildwood). So I’ll make up a list and we’ll figure it out or play by ear. There is also just seeing Philly and going to a nice Steven Starr restaurant too, most of which I also haven’t been to (cause he owns so many).

Sometime in August I’ll be trying to figure out where to apply for a J-O-B. The dissertation should be pretty much done by then, with only the defense left. So I’ll probably just look for something part time at first. I could work at the farm, I probably will end up there, let’s not go there yet though. I am in the midst of a total redesign of the farm’s website though. I hope to get it done soon, like real soon, as I’m sick of the old website, which I have to update and think is user-unfriendly.

So this past week was the first week of dissertation boot camp. This coming week is only 4 days (because of the 4th weekend), so we have to work longer each of those 4 days. As of yet, I’m not sure how productive it’s been for me. The first week I felt I spent far too much time writing lists of “things to do” out as well as trying to explain to my mentor what my project was about (I should have just given him the intro chapter). Finally I said “how about I start writing this chapter, and we’ll see if it makes sense and where it goes.” So that’s what I’m doing this week (and what I wanted to be doing last week, which I only did some of). I think more than anything though it’s gotten me back to sitting down and just writing a good chunk of the day (which believe it or not is not as easy as it sounds if you don’t consider yourself a writer of some type).

Anyway, I need to actually write some today still, but looking outside I see bright sunny clear skies. I’m going to take advantage of it and try and tackle some of that yard work I said was a goal this summer. Like I said, with all the rain, it looks like we live in a swamp. SOMEONE I had recently made friends with had no idea I lived where I lived and actually said “OMG, I thought two old queens lived in that house.” Yeah, it does look like the run down overgrown yard the scary old lady on the block lives in. Once upon a time when John didn’t have the added job responsibilities he does now, he used to like to do all the flowers and landscaping. Now though he has no time for anything (something which is gunna have to change or he’ll have a mental breakdown like I did several times running the soap pages), so it has gone to disarray.

Perhaps I’ll try and get some before and after shots up later. Or maybe a before and in progress shot, cause it’s that bad I tell you

One of my mom’s favorite, if not her favorite, artist is Adam Ant. She has all his albums. During the 80s when MTV was coming into fashion, my parents were the ones with all the “cassette tapes” of the latest artists. My mom in particular had Journey, Cyndi Lauper, Culture Club, Thompson Twins, Adam and the Ants . . . . you name it and she probably had it. My dad, who traveled to Europe often for his job, would come back with versions you couldn’t even get in the US. Thus my parents were the “cool” ones on the block, listening to all the hip and modern music.

This week Singstar (the best videogame ever!) put out some Adam and the Ants. I quickly grabbed “Stand and Deliver.” It’s probably the one rap song I own I actually can score above 6000 in. I think I’ve gotten up to around 8000 on this song. If I’d actually try and sing the verses to the harmony on the screen I might score higher, but I like being nutty as this video shows

I dedicate this to my mommy

As I was driving yesterday I thought “is it time to decorate for Halloween yet?” No, sadly not for months, but it won’t stop me from thinking what new things I can do this year. First though our yard needs serious landscaping. With all the rain we’ve had recently the weeds and overgrowth is out of control. I’m going to try and start clearing stuff out this weekend, assuming the sunny forecast isn’t changed to rain. I’m really tired of this rain, where is summer?

Speaking of Halloween, yet again I am thinking of trying to have a party. Every year I want to have one, I just never do, or figure enough people aren’t around to attend. This year I might actually have enough people who might be able to come, so we’ll see.

Switching topics, the dissertation boot camp has begun. So far I can’t really say how useful it’s been. The first day was basically getting to know everyone, talking about our issues and meeting with advisers/mentors who are supposed to give us some help and feedback. I meet with mine again on Thursday, he wants me to basically have some summary paragraphs for my data chapters written as well as a list of everything I still have to do. I spent today basically making the list and writing some, but I don’t feel I accomplished all that much today. I actually did, as I had to dig through all my notes and files and make this “to do list,” but I didn’t get much writing done. We’ll see how tomorrow goes, as all I have to do is focus on the writing.

So Thursday I headed to Philly to meet Emily as well as Becky. We went on a ghost tour around Philly, then went out to dinner. At dinner I ordered a veggie boxtie, an Irish equivalent of a quesadilla using potato pancakes. I was so starving that I dug in, and near the end realized they had given me chicken! I think I had gone four weeks with no meat and then ruined Oh well, I’ll live.

After dinner we hit the drag show at Bob and Barbs. This used to be a weekly event the students at the anthro department would attend. One of John and mine first dates ended up here too. I hadn’t been in years though, probably since a friend I would go with moved away. Oh my God, it’s still as much fun as it was years ago.

The next day we hit New York to meet up with Aravis. We walked around the city for a bit then went to Serendipity for dinner. Emily talks about how they have the best burgers ever. I was supposed to eat there a year ago with another NY trip, but I had a major hangover then and bailed while others went to dinner that night. I did decide my vegetarianism had been accidentally interrupted, so I had a burger so I didn’t have to keep hearing Emily talk about what I missed out on. It was good, but it was no Five Guys! Anyway, I am back to being a vegetarian today . . . though still will eat fish (I would eat tuna even the 7 years I was a vegetarian before).

Meeting Becky and Aravis was awesome, I wish we all had some more time to chill and hang-out. I’m sure I’ll see them again though. Speaking of hangovers, if you have not seen “The Hangover” then you must see it! I laughed so hard I thought I would piss myself. It is seriously that good of a movie, if you like dirty potty humor movies that is

Last night I did not fall asleep until around 6am this morning, which I guess counts as this morning and not last night. I just COULD not get to sleep. When I finally did though, what dreams!

I dreamed I was back in Glen Cove in Fairfax, Va; where most of my childhood was spent. However someone had painted our old house in this ugly hippy design, attaching all these giant artwork butterflies and stuff to it. I decided to take some photos to put on Facebook. Then I went around back to where the old woods we played in were. These were town homes, and I found almost everyone either had added these silly shacks onto the back of the house, or had trailers back there. It was for all the extra kids they had and didn’t have enough room for in the house! So I took photos of that too. Oh did I mention by this time it was dark out? Well some woman though I was a pervert and started chasing me with intent to kill. Running from her I ended up running into a giant black bear, which then started chasing the both of us. As I’m trying to use my phone to simultaneously take photos and call for help, it broke. Then I realized I had two days to get it fixed before the year warranty ran out, cursing myself for not buying the apple care for 2 years.

Then I finally woke up. The iphone 3.0 software update is out today. Clearly that influenced my dream

Today was the first day I woke up not feeling like total crap. I think I’m finally over this cold/pink-eye bug.

As you can see from the side bar, I brought twitter back. I tried to follow as many people as I could find again. This is a new account though, my old one is dead as a doornail and not working. So if you wish, you can follow me at the new one through the side bar (click through to the twitter page and follow me there).

I registered for the dissertation boot camp, which begins next week. It’s going to be hell, but hell I need. I know I’ll be able to make a giant dent in my pile of stuff and be almost close to done when it ends.

I downloaded about 5 html editor/design programs for the mac and have to find the time to fiddle with them and see if I like any enough to fork the dough over for them. I’m coming up with ideas for how I want the farm’s site to look.

Oh, the farm is running a full page ad in a local paper soon. I’ll scan it and post it, as I helped with it A lot of the photos I took are going to be in it too! We’ll have to add this to my resume!